Today I'm thinking about how standards change throughout Motherhood. What brings this up? Well, as I look at my 3 year old half still in his jammies, with a shirt and shorts (well it is 20 degrees out today compared to 30 below that's kinda hot) over the top of his monkey pajamas and a trace of ketchup left on his face from lunch...I think to myself, before I had children this never would have happened. Before I had children, I had a picture of clean faced, booger free children...who always matched, were on an organized routine and of course very well behaved.
With Big Jerk, I was able to uphold that standard pretty well, but with each additional child my standards have become quite skewed. To be honest, I was so busy trying to keep Crazy Jerk (my 2nd child) from killing himself, I just had to ease up or I would have been in the loony bin. However, even with the 1st two children, their clothing often at least coordinated if it wasn't a perfect match. They were at least usually clean when we went in public, and we did a lot more organized activities together. As soon as they turned one year old, their bottles and pacifiers went in the trash. So, I'm not sure what happened between then and now, but I just laid my 17 month old down for a nap with a bottle
and a pacifier.
Most likely, I've realized what really matters. I've learned to give my worries to the Lord, and ask him for guidance in raising these young men. Surely they will not take they bottle or pacifier to kindergarten, nor will they pee their pants (at least not without a little teasing which may very well fix the problem). Now I'm not saying I've given up completely, but I realize most things work themselves out in due time. Life happens, and it often happens in the midst of potty training or breaking your child of their security.
Last year at this time, I could have (and did) called my mom at any given time, and she would have come to help me out with whatever it is I needed help with. If only I would have known she was going home to Jesus last August, I would have appreciated her even more. It sure makes the little things we worry about seem so trivial. Now I look at my mismatched little boys, and I see something different. I see a child who is learning to be independent...I see something they did that makes them proud.
I have enjoyed being a mom so much more with my ability to relax a bit. They make messes, and I try to use the mess to teach them to clean up after themselves. They pour their own milk, and when they spill I simply tell them to get a towel and wipe it up. I guess it took being a mom for me to learn not to cry over spilled milk. I guess my point is, to find out what matters most. Is it having everything perfect, or taking opportunities when they come, allowing God to work out the details?
Matthew 6:34
Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself.
Each day has enough trouble of it's own.
